- It’s normal to face various conflicts after marriage, don’t easily magnify conflicts, this is a bad habit that many women have. In a relationship, treat the other person as if they were the same as yourself.
Communicate in an organized manner, and focus on the main points when arguing. Take care of each other on a regular basis, and stick to the facts when arguing, don’t magnify the conflict. You should know that when conflicts arise, you and him are not opponents, you and the problem itself are opponents. - Don’t pursue unconditional love, a “good enough” marriage can make everyone comfortable. After all, marriage is a happy game between people. Since they are people, they all have a dark side, so “good enough is okay” is a very important mindset.
Don’t pursue a man to take care of your emotions 100%, good enough is okay; don’t demand a man to be 100% honest with you, good enough is okay; don’t expect a man to do things 100% according to your expected plan, good enough is okay. We should try to accept the fact that others love themselves more than they love us, and they love their own families more than they love us. There are no 100% lovers, only two 50% people. Challenging human nature is very dangerous.
Be more generous, be more tolerant, and the feelings can last. - Don’t put all your eggs in one basket, improve your life’s ability to resist risks. You should live a multi-dimensional life and never put all your eggs in one basket. Some people are workaholics, and they have nothing but their careers. Once their careers have problems, their world collapses;
Some people are love brains, they have nothing but love. Once love has a problem, the sky collapses. You should spread your emotional dependence to different aspects, strive hard in your career, be proactive in love, be good at managing friendships, have a wide range of hobbies in life, and if there is a problem in any aspect, other aspects will immediately make up for it.
A gentleman does not stand under a dangerous wall, never put yourself in a dangerous situation where the sky may collapse. - You need to have strength, men love women without defects more. The stronger you are, the more they love you, because that means that they get more benefits from you and less trouble. This is the real demand for male love.
- You must have the ability to “turn the page”, and the behavior of frequently turning over old accounts really hurts people. When two people quarrel, one of the most terrifying things is “turning over old accounts”. No matter how affectionate they are usually, it hurts too much to turn over old accounts.
The person who turns over old accounts is very painful, feeling that no matter how they perform, they have been nailed to the pillar of shame, unable to turn over, and are disheartened about this relationship. Those who turn over old accounts are not much better. The past unhappiness is like a torrent of river water, endless, torturing the body and heart.
When turning over old accounts, we subconsciously turn the relationship between two people into an opposition, and we must distinguish between winners and losers. In the long run, the marriage basically won’t go far. Even if it lasts a long time, it will hardly be sweet. - Marriage, it is not recommended for you to help the poor. It is very dangerous for a man from the bottom to become rich. It’s okay if you don’t get rich. He fails for a lifetime, because there is nothing to choose, so he dare not be too bad in conscience, and he can mix a meal for a lifetime, live in a house, and raise one or two children.
Honesty is mainly because of lack of ability. Once you get rich, abandoning the old is a routine operation. Compared with women, men are much more pragmatic, and love is such a vague thing, they really don’t think as much as you think.
- Although we say that love is not all of marriage, it is still recommended that you choose the person you love when you enter marriage. Do not overestimate love, nor underestimate the lubricating effect of love in marriage. Love is a kind of anesthesia, in order to let you face the endless responsibilities and obligations of marriage, you can enjoy it, and you can not be so painful.
Perhaps love will be worn out in the long marriage, but as long as it has existed, these pains and fatigue are supported; it is like a box containing precious old photos, even if the time in the photos is no longer, but when you can’t hold on, open it and look at it, it can warm you up and fill you with strength. - Never give up personal growth, this is your confidence, and it is your trump card. No matter how beautiful a set of clothes is, if you wear it every day, even if you don’t feel bored, your partner will be bored. In fact, our character and ability are the same.
If you were 50 points yesterday, 50 points today, and 50 points tomorrow, people will see through you at a glance, and your life with your partner will become more and more boring. But if you are willing to grow, you were 50 points yesterday, you worked hard to find a method, and next week you became 60 points, then you changed the scoring method, and the next week you were 70 points. First, your confidence will become stronger and stronger,
Second, your partner will enjoy listening to your growth story sharing more and more. - The most comfortable marital relationship is to be yourself and take care of the other person: it is ideal to have yourself and love; it is not bad to have yourself without love; if you don’t have yourself but have love, you will become more and more lost, and you will never be happy in your life. If you don’t have yourself and love, it’s the most failed life.
- Don’t trust men too much. To be precise, don’t trust human nature too much, and guide men’s pay. Women need to keep in mind in their married life: share the value of labor, let the husband participate more in housework and child education, teach children to do homework, gradually train, if you don’t cooperate with me, I won’t let you have a good life. Women should not easily give up their jobs. If there are good development opportunities, let the husband support you, whoever has the ability will have the final say.
If it is your parents who give money to your husband to start a business and open a company, remember to control the financial power, the direction of funds, it is best to be a boss lady to manage the money, otherwise you really don’t know what will happen. Others are good, not as good as yourself. The same is true for partners.